Miloš Zeman and Karel Schwarzenberg met yesterday for a tête-à-tête behind closed doors. No one knows what was said, but here's our fabrication. "My dear Karel," said Zeman. "Now that we're gotten the niceties out of the way, let's cut the crap. You've read the Constitution; I've read the Constitution. You know you don't have a leg to stand on in this silly little dispute over appointing ambassadors. It says right there in black and white that the president appoints and removes ambassadors, with the PM's co-signature. You know full well that Nečas is on my side, so I'm going to tell you what we're going to do. I get all the ambassadors I want, and that means especially Vladimír Remek and Livia Klausová. Most of the others I don't give a damn about anyway. And just to show you that I'm not a bad guy, I'll let you have Alexandr Vondra. Publicly, you can call it a compromise or whatever else you like. You can even drag it out for a few days, to make it sound as though we're still negotiating. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have other things to do."